Top Gear Series 14 Episode 2

It’s the second show into the 14th series of Top Gear and in this episode: James drives a milk float. Richard says, “Look out!” backwards and Jeremy cuts his finger on some aluminium.

The show opens with the first part of their feature segment where they attempt to build their own electric car to rival the G-Wiz. Jezza’s in-charge with the syling; James on the powertrain; and Richard, with the chassis and brakes. They basically round up an old TVR Chimera chassis, an electric motor from a milk float, a couple of batteries, and some aluminum sheeting for the body.

The result is “Geoff” which basically looks like a third-world stainless steel Jeep knock-off from the Philippines. At least it seats three (with Richard’s head sticking out like in the Popemobile) and has a cassette tape deck.They test drive it around Oxford, and even on the A34. Eventually, they park it in a field after running out of juice where the car just gets smashed on a tree.

On to the news. The boys talk about a bit of Formula One where Sheffield-based Manor Motorsport will be racing next season; the police buying Mitsubishi i-MiEVs as patrol cars, the effect of cars on men’s testosterone levels, and an invitation to people to write about their opinions on which car company has produced the alrgest number of great cars on the TG website.

We like how the car reviews are now done two at a time where the cars basically go head-to-head. In the review segment, Jezza drives around the track with the Audi R8 V10. The V10 R8 has everything technically right, save for the downside that it’s a “funless” car. Against it, the show features the cheaper and faster and more fun. Around the track, the V10 R8 gets around in 1:21.6 a lap while the Corvette ZR1 does it a bit faster at 1:20.4.

The star in a reasonably-priced car is Michael Sheen who appears in the Twilight: New Moon movie. Jezza and Michael discuss Michael’s film work, his interesting family, and his car history (Datsun Sunny, Ford Orion, and a scooter). Amazingly, Michael is the fastest Welshman on the board with a 1:46.3 lap time – a tie with Gordon Ramsay – despite being jet lagged and driving on a damp track.

Next up is the second part of their EV feature. The car remains almost exactly the same save for a few tweaks. The new improvements include more batteries to which a diesel generator is attached to constantly charge the battery. The car also gets a front bumper and a new name – “Hammerhead-I Eagle Thrust.”

Thinking to sell the car, the boys head out to do some EU standard tests which include a crash test (at 30 mph and the boys as dummies) and a pendumlum test to test the side impact sturdiness. They do a bit of classic filming wizardry to get around the tests.

For the crash test, they drive and move real slow so that it looks like a real crash when played at a higher speed. For the pendulum test, they acted out in reverse (where Richard yells “Twa cool!”) so that it looks just like a pendulum test when played in reverse.

They also subject the Hammerhead-I to drag race involving a Prius, a cyclist, a runner, and a G-Wiz. Richard, driving the Hammerhead-I, jumps the line but maintained a decent speed to come second to the Prius and well-ahead of the G-Wiz.

The car also gets driven on the cobblestone road test where the diesel generator exhaust gets disconnected, gassing the boys. The car also fails to get even to a third up the hill test and gets blown away by the fan in a wind tunnel. To confirm the range, the car is driven flat out around the track by the Stig’s green cousin (wearing an all-green outfit, sandals, and solar panels on his helment). Too bad for him, he gets posioned by the diesel exhausts.

Finally, they send the car to Autocar to be independently test driven. They end the show reading some quotes from the Autocar test drive and the boys close out looking and sounding totally disheartened.

Funny show though.